“Humbug” is episode twenty of season two of The X-Files.
The episode opens at night in Gibsonton, Florida. Two boys are playing in a swimming pool and something with scaly skin is watching them. One kid briefly hears something, then turns back. Then one scream, as an odd man with scaly skin jumps into the pool. Who the children then greet as ‘Dad.’ He’s apparently back early. He sends his sons inside to get ready for bed, but something else is watching him. It gets into the pool and attacks the man; according to the painting on his van, Jerald Glazebrook, the Alligator Man.
Mulder is telling Scully what happened, as she looks at a photo of Glazebrook. He says that she won’t learn what happened from that photo; the victim suffered from ichthyosis, a congenital skin disorder that results in the shedding of the epidermal skin in the form of scales.
Mulder has another photo of Glazebrook’s wound. There are no other wounds and nothing else was damaged. There have been 48 attacks over 28 years in nearly every state. The victims covered a wide range. The killings seem to be motiveless; they match no known cult and a serial killer would have surely escalated. Mulder wants to know Scully’s initial thoughts. Which are imagine going through your whole life looking like this.
Mulder and Scully arrive at Glazebrook’s funeral, and the sheriff nods in greeting. The priest has no arms, Glazebrook’s wife is a bearded lady and, on looking around, Scully realises that the attendees are different to the norm. The priest says that Glazebrook was a well-known escape artist, but this is one box that no-one can escape from. The coffin starts shaking, it’s moved and a man is clawing his way out of the ground. He hammers a railroad spike into his chest as an act of homage. The funeral deteriorates into turmoil with Mulder and Scully left sitting quietly. Mulder can’t wait to see what the wake is like.
Later, the sheriff tells them that Glazebrook would have been headlining Vegas as an escape artist, if not for his condition that relegated him to sideshows. The town was founded by members of the Barnum & Bailey troupe in the 20s. Scully thinks a sideshow performer would have the opportunity and motive to do the killings. The sheriff interrupts her; around there, they call them very special people. On the inside, they are as normal as everyone. In which case, according to Scully, they would be just as likely to become serial killers. Mulder wants to know about an illustration on the menu.
They are taken to see Hepcat Helm, who runs a funhouse. He hates that name. The menu illustration is of the Fiji Mermaid, some humbug that Barnum pulled last century. A real live mermaid that was a real dead monkey sewed to a fish’s tail. So bad it was billed as a genuine fake. Which made more people want to see it. According to Mulder, there were tracks at the last few crime scenes that were unidentifiable, but might be simian in nature.
Mulder and Scully stay for the night, renting trailers at a trailer park. Mulder asks the manager, who is rather short, if he’s done much circus work. The manager takes offense about being judged by his appearance, simply because he’s of short stature. If he did the same to Mulder, judging by initial appearances, he would judge Mulder as a government employee, an FBI agent, rather than as an individual. Mulder pulls out his ID and says he is an FBI agent. That did not work.
One man from the funeral escorts them to their caravans. He used to headline in sideshows – he has a large bulge sticking from his stomach – and says it was the best work he ever had. Just stand there, and occasionally introduce the bulge as his brother. The manager convinced him to give it up.
Hepcat is working when something enters his workshop and attacks. The next morning, Mulder is running when he sees a tattooed man come out of the river with a fish in his mouth. Lenny, who escorted Mulder and Scully to their caravans, knocks on her door and tells her there’s been another one. At the scene, Mulder realises that the attacker came through a tiny window.
Back at the trailer park, the man who hammered a spike into his chest is dangling above a cauldron of water in a straightjacket. On asked, he says he is Dr. Blockhead; he does astound tricks of body manipulation. Then hammers a nail into his nose. Mulder helps him extract it. The man from the river is in the pot, and Dr Blockhead introduces him as the Conundrum. A geek; he eats anything. Then Dr Blockhead feeds the Conundrum insects. Which he then offers to Scully. She takes and eats one. As they leave, she shows Mulder she didn’t. He has Blockhead’s nail and is going to test the blood against the second lot found at the latest murder. Scully heads to a Museum of Curiosities and gets an explanation of various things from the caretaker, who is rarely fully seen.
This episode is rather more humorous than any other. It’s probably the first episode of the series that is funny – even with a number of murders. At one point, Mulder and Scully have an earnest discussion about judging by appearances – and then continue right along with what they were doing.